Hugsum Daginn Minn, Í Dag Og Í Gær

Well then, nice week so far. Super nice week really, it’s been nice. Over the weekend went back home to see Sarah and the guys as she’d come back from London village so I thought it rude not to come back.

Went to go see “30 Days Of Night” a predictable vampire romp. Only this time in the snow and in a town at the top of America where they don’t see the sunlight for 30 days. Sounds really interesting and it really could have been if they’d have worked on it a bit. However the vampires they chose really did look the gayest vampires in the world, it sounds cliché but the one did look like the singer from the Pet Shop Boys (I’ll try to prove this with a picture). Whilst the others looked like the pink end of the world strongest man tournament. With two...maybe three lady vampires between the lot of them. So this band of camp vampires arrive by massive oil tanker and decide to tick all the horror boxes as they go along.

1) - They kill the protagonist’s close relative

2) - The protagonist’s friend becomes “one of them”

3) - They have the whole “he’s going to change...we’ve got to kill him” thing.

4) - They all go a bit mental and one person decides that “he aint staying here for
them to come and kill me” so he swiftly goes outside for them to kill him to bits.

5) - And a loosely pinned on romance story, which results in death. Obviously.

Some great lines too, a prisoner, half naked and panting asking Josh Hartnett “finish me off” raised more than a titter, as did “I saw what you did back there with your axe, think you can do that 3 or 4 more times?” Strewth Josh, I dunno, give me a break in between and I’ll give it my best shot?

Then onto the most homoerotic film I’ve seen in a while in “A Nightmare On Elm Street 2”. Basic premise being that Freddy’s spirit has lived on and inhabits the house which these unsuspecting Americanas move into. The kids a bit weird and has dreams where Freddy tries to possess him. Least that’s what I hope he was trying to do, because he walked around his dreams pretty much naked for a leering Freddy to tell him every now and again that he had the body he’d been looking for and that he wanted to be inside of him. Hm. The argument for the slightly mincing theme continues with the fact that as soon as Freddy has control of this body he takes it to an underground gay club, takes home the gym instructor and whips him (naked) to death. Quite. I’m excited for number three! (Freddy takes the form of a Golden Retriever!).

I ended up drinking vodka straight out the bottle, as there were no mixers. It made me very happy, zero hang-over, good times. Wolverhampton town was again slightly stunted. Yet again the Civic was closed and only the wulfren was being used to squeeze all of Wolverhampton’s wonderful people under one roof. And the Pigeon Detectives were on the decks, spinning tunes likable to that of “100.7 HEART FM INDIE HOUR! LET’S ROOOOOOCCCCCCKKKKK”. A bit gay, but the lead singer soon got tired, presumably out of stress of keeping that gigantic nose of his upright and went off for a sleep. Or to have sex with a collection of ugly femmes all waiting down my the barrier staring upwards at their greasy pale skin the epitomisation of raw sex.

But twas a very good night enjoyed by all, more so by Mike who was so drunk he thought I’d taken an entire taxi ride with him to Codsall, when in fact I’d gone to Tettenhall. And taken a completely different taxi in the first place. Going in opposite directions. Bless him.

But yes, from then another Sunday spent at home, every day is like Sunday there. Nothing really happens, it’s nice sometimes. Other times it drags a bit. It’s better when people are around too really. Means it’s not just me, mum, dad and my cat. Alarmingly LuLu gets included in more and more conversations.

“What are you looking at LuLu?” - they’ll say

“LuLu, for the last time David Cameron’s ‘yo blair’ antics don’t constitute a leader, it’s new labour in disguise lulu! Why can’t you see the situation for what it is? GOD!” - Who knows....maybe one day?

And then of course Biff on monday, you already know my feelings towards that, super awesome-o.

So I arrive back to university. This house is a tip, my room is tidy and lovely because I’m like that, I like to have somewhere where there isn’t complete chaos, I like a bit of lived in mess but I can’t seem to get a happy middle ground, cause this place is so small it gets un tidy so quickly. I cleaned my windows this morning, inside and out. Go me eh? My room to explain is roughly three feet by 4, with a sink attached to one of the walls next to a wardrobe. I have a desk with my computer and tv on, with shelves above. In the corner I get a wire mesh which I’ve had comfirmed by carbon dating to be an early Roman equivalent of a torture rack COUGH I mean bed. And I have two chairs, but there’s only one of me. So the other chair lives at the end of my bed, quite often with my jeans on. Fascinating. I have a lot of posters, since this picture, there are more.

One positive of university and living away from home I guess is the fact that I’ve lost some weight. Well so far two stone since September 19^th. So that’s a stone a month I guess? That’s pretty good, 3 stone by Christmas hopefully? Then I can put it all back on again in two weeks. Hurrah. Another good thing would be the independence, the new people, the course itself is super and will only get better I think. Those are the plusses. Oh and the internet connection, that’s bossing. Hellooooo streamed media. But still it’s not all perfect.

I miss people dreadfully. I try to stay here as much as possible but I’m always finding myself coming back for the smallest of reasons. I miss Nathalie dreadfully. In a way I wish I had been clever enough to go to Manchester, but on the same hand I wouldn’t want to corner her. It’s just nice when I get to see her more, it’s why I’m looking forward to Christmas so much I think. It’s really bad sometimes. Certain songs get to me more than they should, certain lines from fims or books. Currently it’s Starálfur by Sigur Rós. Which if the internet is to be believed is about elfs in the wood. Hm, but I think it’s just lovely, all pianos. I find pianos so provocative, it’s because I don’t understand them. I don’t know if I’d want to, because I wouldn’t be able to play what’s in my head, that’s the most frustrating thing about any instrument, when you’ve got something in your head that you can’t put down or make the thing in your hand do. And then inevitably you forget what it was you were trying to do, so I usually look for bands to write the music that I’m thinking of. And in many way that’s what Starálfur is, I mean it’s in Icelandic I don’t know what he’s saying but I know what I’d be saying. It’s hard to describe. But it’s beautiful, it peaks and picks you up and you almost float on top of it. It’s delightful, I’ll try and find a link to it for you.

I miss my friends too, being away from my comrades sucks. I feel like I’m constantly catching up. It’s sad.

Watched - ‘The Royal Tenenbaums” recently. Made me realise I still want to write more than anything in the world.

Read – ‘Brighton Rock’ by Graham Greene. Excellent morality and spiritual book caught me completely off guard. And ‘The Remains Of The Day’ by Kazuo Ishiguro, real slow burner frustrating but deeply sad novel.

That’s all for now.

Love you and miss you.

x

Sigur Rós. Hope you love it too.

BIFFY!

Well fun, well fun.

If you’d seen half the things in my mind, you'd have the chance to float away.

Oh as for Soulwax

I don't think I was drunk enough, or on E.

I think that marred my evening, that and I went and did my knee in again, which killed, someone trod on my foot and another person barged me right on the knee joint, queue a "click clonk" noise from my knee joint and shooting pains going to my calf and thigh. Weak.

If it weren't for the fact that Soulwax themselves were....dull, and didn't even play E-talking...sigh and then 2 many Djs didn't come on till half 3 in the morning by which time I was crippled, skint (3.80 for aq Bud, the wateryist of all watery american beer) and just plain tired. Plus people kept on smoking into my face.

In better news it's only a week and a few days till Biffy, and I'm currently on a wave of loving them so that gig will be filled with much joy.

You make patterns in my face, you painted pictures with my tears.

I'm feeling old and I'm feeling bored and I'm feeling tired and I'm not sure if I've lost my fight or my fire or that I've got no place to put my fight or fire anymore. I'm confused and on the edge of my emotions currently, I feel trapped with these feelings that are simply rising up and I've got no where to put them because they're spurned at every advance. And I'm made to feel stupid and alone and no longer part of this little collective we've got, we're not sharing problems anymore there just are problems and then if I'm not causing them I'm not able to make them go away. I feel just like I did when I was a stupid 16 year old kid. I've fooled myself into thinking that I've managed to master myself and know how I feel and how other people feel and I just don't have a clue, the last 11 months therefore have simply been guess work that's managed to pay off.

The sun is setting and I'm really feeling very hot and all my energy is sapped. I've not really slept and maybe I'm just punching at shadows and everything will be fine. I know I haven't changed. Maybe I have and I didn't realise and I'm this monster, but I don't think I deserve to feel this way.



This week I am going to get back to my roots and faff around with Mikey. I miss last summer so much, even though it was the summer where everyone left it felt so full of expectation and excitement for the future, now I think I know about the future and what it's got in store for me and I'm not sure if I'm petrified or exhilarated by the prospect of it all. I think it's mainly fear. I miss Dickie more than anyone who's left this year for uni and not come back, and he's been gone half the time they have, I miss me Mike and Dickie being round his, just laughing around in the sunshine, watching saurt africkans rugby and lying around on the trampaline giving each other static electric shocks and our amazing 2 pub, pub crawl with one pub being visited twice. Last year I looked forward to leeds festival, this year I look forward to it and dread it at the same time. I'm looking forward to it as everyone will be together, and when everyone is togther, we're a good bunch of people, we've always bounced off each other in a really good way, and it'll be nice waking up with these guys and making fires and drinking and making fires and walking in the mud with these people, but I think in the back of my mind I'll be constantly thinking that it's practically the end of the summer and that in a few days I'll be saying goodbye to everyone all over again to move away to university. I wish I'd gone to Stafford now. Because then at least I'd have my mates with me. I think I'm going to be coming home on the train a few times this year if only for a catch up and a sit down on comfy sofas with warm company.

I need a job currently, quite a lot. I don't think I'm finding it very easy to acustom myself to the new limits on my spending and I'm struggling to do the things I want to do. Because it seems that the things I like, lying around on grass and walking around looking at cows aren't interesting to many people, who infact don't enjoy free things, things have to cost money to do, if they don't cost money to do then they're not actually things at all. I'm going to be bankrupt by the end of August.

Partly to get out the house too, I'm going slightly mental. It seems everything was better when I had a job, I had somewhere to go, I had a reason, I had an importance I had a reason to be asked to things, I'm currently some sort of leech in people's eyes and I have no way of changing that viewpoint without getting a job. Tomorrow I'm going to go out and walk in a line and I don't know where the line will take me only that I don't intend to come home till late and that I don't intend to eat.



I think I'm also developing a drink problem. Which I've always wondered about. I've a stupid relationship with drink, it's part of a really bad personality trait. I can't take my time with things I see them and I want the finnished product already, I forget to savour the moment and I just want the end to almost say that I've arrived at that point. So much so that the actual motion itself is lost in the desire by myself to arrive at the end of it all. Much the same with alcohol, I just want to be drunk. I start drinking and I want to be drunk, if I'm not getting drunk I'll either give up and preserve myself in time for the morning or I'll go all out to get out of my head for a while and that's a progressive cycle and an unhealthy one to say the least. It's the way I've always been but it's only now that I'm looking at it like it's a bad thing, and that it's something I can't do anymore. There was a time where I'd drink with my friends in a barn to see our limits, to literally how much we could put inside ourselves before we reached the edge. We'd pass out, and it wasn't untill a few of us including me nearly probably died one night that we stopped. But I still want to go back to absynth. Because even though I have roughtly 3 memories of that night, they're all brilliant ones. Looking up at the skies with Dickie Messer and Mike, Dickie declairing he'd "been all over the world but that's where I wanna be" pointing bleerily to the moon, we all of course greeted this nonsense with choruses of "yeah man, cos that's the thing yeah" at which point I fell off the chair I was on and scraped my arms off the brick wall. Which I didn't discover the extent of till I woke up feeling like I'd been sandpapered. And with a bigger headache that normal, which came from shots at around...late, where I drank, and dropped, and slept, waking only for a moment to see people tickling Dickie. Only in the morning did I realise they were trying to stop him from dyyyying. I loved asynth night. And anyone there who took part loved it too, the feeling of being totally liberated and just out of your body, less so the having to hold onto the ground for fear of falling off the earth.

But yeah, unless it's absynth I'm not really interested anymore I don't think.

Goodnight.

I'm going to go and eat some multi-vitamins and get my self in shape.

Biffy Clyro - Puzzle

Hello then, I’m currently sitting down and listening ever so intently to the new Biffy album – Puzzle. And I’m bored and it’s a bit sunny and unless I’m in shorts next to a pool the sun doesn’t really appeal to me (I just get sweaty) so I thought, y’know, what that hell I’ll do a sort of review/meandering talk on how good Biffy are and that jazz.

So sit down and get a cuppa, here’s my account of a Biffy journey.

Biffy for me are a bit of a new thing, I’ve got to be honest I’m being a bit of a Johnny come lately on this one, I wasn’t there from the start, I don’t have a tattoo of justboy lyrics on my calf in case of emotive emergency but I’d like to think that I’ve got inside the Biffy groove, and the groove is large and chunky with really nice bouncy bass and the kind of drumming that makes me want to take it up long time.

Ok the sound, it’s confusing, it’s intimidating at first, the first song I ever heard, I didn’t like at all, it was just screaming as far as I could see, and that actually put me off them for absolutely ages. But via the wonders of the internet and Last.fm radio 2 Christmases ago, during a phase where they gave away free subscription content for a month (veering off topic much Marshall?) All The Way Down came up and knocked me sideways, it was soft it was slow and then it ripped and took off at crushing pace just when it needed too, I was intrigued to say the least.

But not that intrigued as it took me a year to actually get round to buying Vertigo Of Bliss, which would be the second album and a bit of a silly place to start, but none the less I played it (skipped to All The Way Down mostly sure) and really liked, however they stayed just an occasional listen till I saw them live. Supporting Bloc Party (strange mix) I really only knew three songs, and with one of them a solely performed fan treat, I stood there a little bit confused but liking all the same.

So I took a gamble, which is a bit rare for me and ordered the first and third albums, oh my I wish I still had my job and could still do that but yes, they arrived and quite simply I feel in love with Blackened Sky, I must have listened to that track 20 times in a week, which when you consider back then I had about 20 hours in a week in which to listen to music, it really did make up a large chunk of that. Justboy I connected with straight off, but that’s probably because it’s such a basic song really. It’s heart is in the right place and the lyrics are pretty much your standard teeny angst love, “I don’t believe in anything” Which can be true, I suppose but it’s the music that drives the song for me, it’s triumphant, it’s a two fingered salute to whoever it is that’s fucking you around, it’s a NER in the fact of those people, much the same with 57. It’s just stomping. It’s a good album for softer slower moments, personal favourites being Christopher’s River and Scary Mary.

And then I saw them live once more, declared them to be the best thing since bread were sliced and bought a poster. Job done.

So the new one, Puzzle. Hm, it’s good, because it’s Biffy and its new and they’re fresh and brill. But, saying that a fair few of these songs have been touted around live for so long it sort of feels all a bit familiar, and as far as I can tell from the first few listens there aren’t as many corner stones with which to hang this album on, nothing’s standing out for me, apart from guilty pleasure Saturday Superhouse and that’s done and dusted with within the second track, I kinda get the feeling the album tails off towards the end.

However this is up for editing, as quite often you really can’t judge Biffy after say, 5 listens, maybe it’ll be upon the 20^th listen that the pieces of this particular PUZZLE fall into place.

I’ll get me coat.